holy crap, I'm pregnant! - Beginnings

Yes there is a baby and yes this blog will continue! -- Just need some sleep first...

nospam@example.com (Bobby) — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 11:23:51 -0600

Hi!

I recently recieved a comment asking about the status of the blog and the baby. I replied — at length — and then realised I should just post the reply here!

Here is what I wrote:

I haven’t forgotten about the blog, and I probably should have made some post stating as much by now — but being a Dad is extremely time consuming! Who would have thought? :P I am so busy between baby and work and people constantly coming by and just trying to get some bloody REST that I haven’t had the time to even consider writing.

Well, that’s not true. I considered it.

I just spent all my spare moments vegetating…

Never fear! I will be back soon!! The steady stream of visitors has finally lulled!!!!

Look for several posts in the near future detailing the trials and tribulations and overt freakouts that followed the last post. Be here for the emotional displays! Be here for the tons and TONS of baby pics that I STILL CAN’T STOP TAKING!! Be here for the lack… of… sleep……….. !

And thanks to Kae for kicking me in the ass about this!

Boys, Girls, and Crazy Monkey Babies...

nospam@example.com (Bobby) — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 11:19:00 -0600

The other day, Robin and a friend (who is also pregnant) were messaging each other on Facebook. Robin had mentioned she had heartburn, and that she was getting it fairly often. Her friend responds thus:

“oohh, heart-burn, they say that means your baby will have a load of hair! No bald babies for Bin & Bobby.”

My response to this statement is…eh? Seriously….. eh??

I really don’t get the relationship. I mean, I was a hairy baby — as Robin was so kind to point out to her friend… on Facebook. As a matter of fact, my mother had me convinced until I was eight years old that I was born covered with thick hair — covered everywhere, that is, except for a bald patch on my chest in the shape of an M… for Monkey. Yeah yeah, laugh it up… Anyway, all that hair fell out. And apparently continued to fall out — have you seen my pictures from the last couple years? I can still grow the stuff, but let’s be honest shall we? I am just glad my mother was dilligent in turning me when I was a baby. I have a nice round head that looks good shaven.

But I digress…

The point of this ramble is this: What could heartburn in the mother possilbly have to do with the amount of hair on the the baby — the kind that falls out quickly or otherwise? Isn’t that stuff handled by genetics? I am pretty sure it is… And I believe in magic and unicorns and such. Oh, and dragons. Lots of dragons…

I did some research, and myths such as this one abound. There are tons of them — with multiple variations that often contradict each other and vary by the teller. Most are surrounding the preeminent mystery that is the sex of the baby. The conclusion of my research? Well, I think that people just think they are fun and want to be involved. I can’t blame them. The whole thing is one of life’s great mysteries. It’s nutty! I did have one major epiphany though:

Regarding the sex of the baby…

I think there’s a 50-50 chance.

Anyhoo, read and you will find a small list of some of the different myths I have come across, with the obligatory commentary by me, of course — you didn’t think I would pass up a chance to voice my opinion, did you?

Continue reading "Boys, Girls, and Crazy Monkey Babies... "

The Good, the Bad, and the Bobby

nospam@example.com (Bobby) — Sun, 02 Mar 2008 15:29:58 -0700

Well now… this is where I ask myself:

Do I really want to transfer all of my bad habits to my child?

Seriously. I do some pretty screwy things!

Granted, I don’t drink or do any crazy drugs or smoke or anything like that — but those aren’t the only bad habits in the world. I curse a blue streak, for example. This is a habit I picked up from my mother — although, to be fair, she also instilled in me, very vigorously, the concepts of “a time and place for everything” and “do as I say, not as i do”, which resulted in adults often telling her I was a very polite child — which I was. And am. Unless the situation calls for otherwise. So maybe that isn’t such a bad thing, cursing a blue streak… As long as it is tempered with good sense.

The kid is going to learn the “language” from other kids anyway. And from televsion — and the radio too, nowadays. Don’t even get me started on the interweb. I mean, I was swearing in at least 5 different languages or more by the time I was 9 — and my mother only speaks the one.

So maybe swearing isn’t such a big deal. I’ll just try and temper myself a bit, and attempt to teach the kid good sense.

Good.

Glad we got that covered.

Now what about these other things…?

Continue reading "The Good, the Bad, and the Bobby "

It has a heartbeat!! IT'S ALIIIIIIIVE!!!!!!

nospam@example.com (Bobby) — Tue, 23 Oct 2007 00:52:36 -0600

Tonight, I was going to write the 2nd installment of The Sickness,
as I am still trying to catch the blog up to the actual current
happenings of the pregnancy — but I couldn’t. Today was too
exciting!!! All of you out there who were waiting with baited breath to
see how poor Robin fared with her sickness upon sickness and overall
general discomfort (and I am sure there were a few of you… ), I’m
sorry. You will have to wait.

Why?

Because today was OBGYN day!!!

It
was our first appointment, and Robin was just passed 12 weeks — which
means there was a good chance of hearing the baby’s heartbeat.

Sooooo exciting!

What’s the big deal, you ask? Come ON, man!! We could hear the baby. While it is still this tiny little thing the size of a lime… while it is still inside of her… While…

So freakin’ cool.

Continue reading "It has a heartbeat!! IT'S ALIIIIIIIVE!!!!!! "

So I'm having a baby... Now what?

nospam@example.com (Bobby) — Sat, 20 Oct 2007 12:42:31 -0600

While the first thing I experienced may have been joy — mad, passionate, unadulterated joy — this was quickly followed by an overpowering and extremely urgent new thought:

I need a new job.

Baby’s cost money, man! Anybody can tell you so… And my current job simply was not going to cut it. There were bills to pay, debt to consider, baby classes, LaMas, baby yoga or other excercise, maternity clothes, food, diapers, car seats, strollers, cribs, diapers — did I say diapers? — daycare, moving (no way was a baby going to fit in our basement suite), baby clothes, toys, University — by the time the kid is ready to go to university, it ought to cost as much as buying a house — and what about buying a house??? Holy hell, what about the cost of other kids!?!?!!?

*insert mini panic attack here*

Continue reading "So I'm having a baby... Now what? "

August 23rd... Holy crap, we're pregnant!

nospam@example.com (Bobby) — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 20:43:00 -0600

Wow.

That was all I could say for the first 15 minutes.

Wow…

In retrospect, we probably looked a bit ridiculous, my wife and me, standing there in the bathroom staring at the little stick she had just peed on, periodically swapping our dumbfounded "wow’s" with dumbfounded silence.

The one line is much fainter than the other… does that mean it’s actually negative? Did we read the instructions correctly?

We re-read the instructions.

Wow.

Stunned silence…

But seriously… it couldn’t have happened this soon — could it? I don’t know… That line is really faint. Or is that the other one is really dark? Maybe that’s the one that means we’re pregnant!!

…Are we sure we read the instructions correctly?

We re-read the instructions.

Wow…

Stunned silence…

And so on, and so forth, for the next 15 minutes to half-hour. Eventually, we decided to wait until the next morning, whereupon my wife would take the test again, using the alternate method where she pees in a cup.

Good times.

So the next morning…

Continue reading "August 23rd... Holy crap, we're pregnant! "